Lack of...
I sincerely apologise for not updating this blog, I have been meaning to, but recently I was not in the mood to write or maybe having a writer's block... I've started a post before but then I find myself staring at the blank white space and ended up logging off.
I've been busy lately, not at work but at the personal level. Today is actually my first day at work since Ramadan started. Oh yeah, silly me, Happy Ramadan and may this Ramadan and fasting season give you a lot of blessings from Allah. I have been fasting, I didn't break any despite getting sick for the couple of days now. Boy, do I have a lot of things to share with you... Most of them are dear diary moments, and in fact this will be a dear diary episode of a post. But then again, I can't even remember what happened last week. Everything just zipped pass by me in a flash and it's over and done with, and I didn't even had fun! I think....?
Oh yeah, last Saturday, was the first day of Ramadan and traditionally, we, five siblings break our fast with our parents, it was good. But we (as in my elder brother and I who was on our way to our parents) didn't make it in time for the break. The Ramadan stalls were jam packed and we had a hard time trying to exit, there were too many people and too many cars, it was just too much and too many of everything. We can't even really look at the food that was being sold... There was just too many people. I think you can get the picture, lol. We broke our first fast of the year in my car with a bottle of mineral water followed by one blissful stick of cigarette. We only got home about a few minutes late, but when we were there everything ran amok. Good amok, that is. It's nice to see, hear and experience the hustle and bustle of the family, each trying to gather everyone and my nieces and nephews to keep quiet and sit still. It was nice... I missed the last few years because I didn't get along with my mum for quite a long time, but that's passed, forgotten but not necessarily forgiven, but I try... to move on, that is...
On that day, my mum made a weird request. Well it's not the request that was weird, but it was weird, but it's not-not weird, but that makes it weird again but nevertheless it was weird. My mum, asked if I could accompany her to Limbang (that's across the border to Sarawak) to run an errand (and the errand is a little personal to be put on this blog, because it just is... It's nothing out the ordinary but it was to my point of view, personal) which made it even more weird. I knew she asked me because I was the only one available. My eldest brother is a civil servant, so he would be working, my elder brother is not working, but he couldn't get out of the country because he works in the army. My younger sister, well, she's... well, hmmm let's just say, a different story, so I'll skip her, and my youngest sister, well, she had to take care of the children and send them to school... So that leaves me. My mum told me she'd reconfirm on Sunday for the trip. Sunday came and gone, no confirmation, so I thought, the excursion's off.
Whilst I was nicely in dreamland at about noon on Monday, I got the call, she did ask my youngest sister to reconfirm that the trip on Sunday, but my sister never got round to do it. So it was rush-rush-rush. I took my shower, drove 45 minutes to Tutong Town (rendevous point) and then wait-wait-wait, but the wait was productive, I got to buy groceries for myself. Long outstanding items, such as a dust-pan, yes, a dust-pan and tin can of that room fragrance thing... the one with the timer thing... that sprays every interval that you set it to... so yeah, I got that... I've been meaning to buy those things for nearly a month, but never got round to it. It's silly really, but yeah, I did... Oh sorry, digressing... I waited for, I think was another 45 minutes when they finally arrived...
The journey to Limbang was uneventful, everything went smooth and the view were a little breath taking, but we were sort of in a rush so breath taking took the back seat. When we arrived there there was another wait, the shop that we were at, the technician was out and the rain was pouring, pouring cats and dogs. It was dreadful. Then the technician arrive, we did our thing, there were some waiting and so, we had the longest and the most boring small talk I have ever endured. But perseverance pays in the end. We wanted to get some food to break fast for the family back at home, but since it was raining, my mum changed her mind and decided to head back to Brunei instead.
And the trip back was much smoother, thanks to my skillful driving, but I was also very very cautious because I can't seemed to shake off my mind that traumatic video clip of a family who lost their lives captured by using a phone who was on their trip to Limbang. Somehow that clip sort of repeated over and over in my head and it was just eerie to think about, let alone going through that... I deleted it when I saw it, I couldn't watch it, and if I am not mistaken not long after that, it was announce by the media to stop distributing the video clip. But remembering that clip, it sends chills to my spine. So anyway, we arrive quite early to Brunei, I suggested to my mum that since we could never be in time to be home for break of fast, we might as well go to the Ramadan food stall nearby the National Stadium and get some food, eat some on the way (when it is time to break fast) and eat the rest with the family, my mum liked the idea and obliged.
Cut story short, and I know it's very oh dear diary moments, but please spare me this time, because seriously, I've run out of things to write... So anyway, yeah, cut story short, what was planned went as planned and I returned home at about 10pm. But the drama didn't end there. I had a 'text' fight with my other half. Oh speaking about other halves... it has been more than a month that we have been seeing each other, and going relatively well, I might add, depends how you see it, but yeah, I gave a pat on my back and my other half too, for lasting this long... looks good, feels good. But anyway yeah, we had a fight because my other half thought I was cheating! This is what you get for spying on my mobile phone!... LOL. My other half secretly browsed through my mobile phone, reading my text messages correspondence and misread the date... More than a month and before we met, I had a date that never took place. It didn't happened because... to think about it, I can't even remember... But it never happened and my other half read those old messages thinking it was new!...
First of all, I have nothing to hide, thus I don't mind my other half spying on my mobile phone, but I do think that a mobile phone is a private object. We don't simply borrow and read other peoples' text messages or see who they have been calling or been calling them... I guess it's an unspoken rule of owning a mobile phone. But if say to gain trust, my mobile phone have to go under some scrutiny, so what! It isn't much a big of a deal for me, well, it used to, but it's no longer, because simply, I have got nothing to hide, I have never deleted any messages from my phone since I bought it except when my siblings borrowed my phone and I deleted my other half's text messages so that they don't pry on me. LOL.
But I was really mad. My other half accused me of something I didn't do. But in the end, I proved myself, showed the phone and all obscurities gone and passed, put it in the past and keep it there, it was just a mere misunderstanding. To tell you the truth, the journey with my other half (writing other half is just so, repetitive, so I'll just use OH from now on), so as I was saying... the journey was a bumpy one, I've lost my temper once and we had quite a few quarrels. But in the end, we always manage to sort out our problems, slowly and surely. So that's good thing, I suppose. And I'm always taking things day by day, which helps.
Yesterday, I didn't wake up at all, I slept the whole day, I had a fever. I was still fasting, I didn't want to break my fast, because to "payback" fasting outside Ramadan is really really challenging, and I know couldn't do it, so I slept my fever off. I think I got it after getting myself under the rain on Sunday. So that was why I didn't go to work yesterday, and even today, I'm not feeling any better, but I had decided not to spoil my sickness and try as much to perk up. I am having a bad headache as I am typing all this, but trying to recall the past few days' events to write this blog I sort of forget the headache, but it's coming back now. It's silly that sometimes we notice the subconscious and consequently become conscious thus bringing back the headache... and now consciously trying to be subconscious of it, so that it can push the headache away.... you getting any of this? Oh I'm rambling, so I guess, this is my queue to stop.
And you have got to be kidding me if I am going to spell and grammar check this post...
Until then...
I've been busy lately, not at work but at the personal level. Today is actually my first day at work since Ramadan started. Oh yeah, silly me, Happy Ramadan and may this Ramadan and fasting season give you a lot of blessings from Allah. I have been fasting, I didn't break any despite getting sick for the couple of days now. Boy, do I have a lot of things to share with you... Most of them are dear diary moments, and in fact this will be a dear diary episode of a post. But then again, I can't even remember what happened last week. Everything just zipped pass by me in a flash and it's over and done with, and I didn't even had fun! I think....?
Oh yeah, last Saturday, was the first day of Ramadan and traditionally, we, five siblings break our fast with our parents, it was good. But we (as in my elder brother and I who was on our way to our parents) didn't make it in time for the break. The Ramadan stalls were jam packed and we had a hard time trying to exit, there were too many people and too many cars, it was just too much and too many of everything. We can't even really look at the food that was being sold... There was just too many people. I think you can get the picture, lol. We broke our first fast of the year in my car with a bottle of mineral water followed by one blissful stick of cigarette. We only got home about a few minutes late, but when we were there everything ran amok. Good amok, that is. It's nice to see, hear and experience the hustle and bustle of the family, each trying to gather everyone and my nieces and nephews to keep quiet and sit still. It was nice... I missed the last few years because I didn't get along with my mum for quite a long time, but that's passed, forgotten but not necessarily forgiven, but I try... to move on, that is...
On that day, my mum made a weird request. Well it's not the request that was weird, but it was weird, but it's not-not weird, but that makes it weird again but nevertheless it was weird. My mum, asked if I could accompany her to Limbang (that's across the border to Sarawak) to run an errand (and the errand is a little personal to be put on this blog, because it just is... It's nothing out the ordinary but it was to my point of view, personal) which made it even more weird. I knew she asked me because I was the only one available. My eldest brother is a civil servant, so he would be working, my elder brother is not working, but he couldn't get out of the country because he works in the army. My younger sister, well, she's... well, hmmm let's just say, a different story, so I'll skip her, and my youngest sister, well, she had to take care of the children and send them to school... So that leaves me. My mum told me she'd reconfirm on Sunday for the trip. Sunday came and gone, no confirmation, so I thought, the excursion's off.
Whilst I was nicely in dreamland at about noon on Monday, I got the call, she did ask my youngest sister to reconfirm that the trip on Sunday, but my sister never got round to do it. So it was rush-rush-rush. I took my shower, drove 45 minutes to Tutong Town (rendevous point) and then wait-wait-wait, but the wait was productive, I got to buy groceries for myself. Long outstanding items, such as a dust-pan, yes, a dust-pan and tin can of that room fragrance thing... the one with the timer thing... that sprays every interval that you set it to... so yeah, I got that... I've been meaning to buy those things for nearly a month, but never got round to it. It's silly really, but yeah, I did... Oh sorry, digressing... I waited for, I think was another 45 minutes when they finally arrived...
The journey to Limbang was uneventful, everything went smooth and the view were a little breath taking, but we were sort of in a rush so breath taking took the back seat. When we arrived there there was another wait, the shop that we were at, the technician was out and the rain was pouring, pouring cats and dogs. It was dreadful. Then the technician arrive, we did our thing, there were some waiting and so, we had the longest and the most boring small talk I have ever endured. But perseverance pays in the end. We wanted to get some food to break fast for the family back at home, but since it was raining, my mum changed her mind and decided to head back to Brunei instead.
And the trip back was much smoother, thanks to my skillful driving, but I was also very very cautious because I can't seemed to shake off my mind that traumatic video clip of a family who lost their lives captured by using a phone who was on their trip to Limbang. Somehow that clip sort of repeated over and over in my head and it was just eerie to think about, let alone going through that... I deleted it when I saw it, I couldn't watch it, and if I am not mistaken not long after that, it was announce by the media to stop distributing the video clip. But remembering that clip, it sends chills to my spine. So anyway, we arrive quite early to Brunei, I suggested to my mum that since we could never be in time to be home for break of fast, we might as well go to the Ramadan food stall nearby the National Stadium and get some food, eat some on the way (when it is time to break fast) and eat the rest with the family, my mum liked the idea and obliged.
Cut story short, and I know it's very oh dear diary moments, but please spare me this time, because seriously, I've run out of things to write... So anyway, yeah, cut story short, what was planned went as planned and I returned home at about 10pm. But the drama didn't end there. I had a 'text' fight with my other half. Oh speaking about other halves... it has been more than a month that we have been seeing each other, and going relatively well, I might add, depends how you see it, but yeah, I gave a pat on my back and my other half too, for lasting this long... looks good, feels good. But anyway yeah, we had a fight because my other half thought I was cheating! This is what you get for spying on my mobile phone!... LOL. My other half secretly browsed through my mobile phone, reading my text messages correspondence and misread the date... More than a month and before we met, I had a date that never took place. It didn't happened because... to think about it, I can't even remember... But it never happened and my other half read those old messages thinking it was new!...
First of all, I have nothing to hide, thus I don't mind my other half spying on my mobile phone, but I do think that a mobile phone is a private object. We don't simply borrow and read other peoples' text messages or see who they have been calling or been calling them... I guess it's an unspoken rule of owning a mobile phone. But if say to gain trust, my mobile phone have to go under some scrutiny, so what! It isn't much a big of a deal for me, well, it used to, but it's no longer, because simply, I have got nothing to hide, I have never deleted any messages from my phone since I bought it except when my siblings borrowed my phone and I deleted my other half's text messages so that they don't pry on me. LOL.
But I was really mad. My other half accused me of something I didn't do. But in the end, I proved myself, showed the phone and all obscurities gone and passed, put it in the past and keep it there, it was just a mere misunderstanding. To tell you the truth, the journey with my other half (writing other half is just so, repetitive, so I'll just use OH from now on), so as I was saying... the journey was a bumpy one, I've lost my temper once and we had quite a few quarrels. But in the end, we always manage to sort out our problems, slowly and surely. So that's good thing, I suppose. And I'm always taking things day by day, which helps.
Yesterday, I didn't wake up at all, I slept the whole day, I had a fever. I was still fasting, I didn't want to break my fast, because to "payback" fasting outside Ramadan is really really challenging, and I know couldn't do it, so I slept my fever off. I think I got it after getting myself under the rain on Sunday. So that was why I didn't go to work yesterday, and even today, I'm not feeling any better, but I had decided not to spoil my sickness and try as much to perk up. I am having a bad headache as I am typing all this, but trying to recall the past few days' events to write this blog I sort of forget the headache, but it's coming back now. It's silly that sometimes we notice the subconscious and consequently become conscious thus bringing back the headache... and now consciously trying to be subconscious of it, so that it can push the headache away.... you getting any of this? Oh I'm rambling, so I guess, this is my queue to stop.
And you have got to be kidding me if I am going to spell and grammar check this post...
Until then...
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