Back to The Hell Hole
It is afternoon. And I'm back. In the office.
Back to the old desk job. Yesterday was my last day as a CSR. And flight return was the last flight back onshore on my very last day. If you have added me in your facebook, you can see the pictures. I've decided to keep this blog picture free. Until I get bored of words. LOL.
It was quite an emotional departure, luckily a friend who is also a rigger who works for me talked to me until my chopper arrives and I unconsiously managed to hide my tears. I looked around at the area and I know it won't be the last time I will be there. But the next time when I do go offshore again, it won't be the same. Actually I am sad that I had to leave my guys. These guys I work with or work for me are really great men. They made me feel at home and their progress with work is relentless. I will miss Aiedee, Lagan, Khiddir, Himli and Clemond. These are the guys who I am close with. And off work they are my friends.
A few of them like Aiedee, Khiddir and Clemond will be my friends wherever they are. They don't just work for me or with me, but they are really good friends of mine.
So anyway, just an update about The Crush a.k.a "C". Since I asked myself when would I stop stuttering and being awkward when I face "C". I've decided to confront by giving "C" a call from offshore. And I told "C" everything. EVERYTHING. My feelings for "C" and all of that. And all I got were silence. I asked "C" whether "C" is angry or mad with my confession. "C" replied with a simple "Inda" ("Nope"). "C" just remain quiet and sounded a little awkward. After that phone call, I tried calling or messaging "C" to no avail. "C" is now ignoring me. I did ask "C" whether if my feelings is being reciprocated or not. Nothing.
So much for much for my big, big mouth. Now "C" is ignoring me. I am a ghost. But there is some relieve of some kind, I felt like a huge mountain have been lifted of my shoulder and now it's slowly turning into regret. Regret in this sense, is not regret that I have confessed my feelings to "C". But the regret is about now I've lost "C", because I think, and I presume "C" do not want to be friends or got to do anything with me anymore. I've lost "C". But I guess, not all is lost. Except for my pride and dignity. That has gone to the toilet.
So there you go... I'm still actually waiting for a miracle. Waiting for "C" to respond back. "C" promised to come back to me and give an answer. Perhaps "C" is thinking about what had I said. So I guess, I better hide myself for now. Feeling like wanting to be alone for a while. Until then, take good care of yourself and Ciao!
Back to the old desk job. Yesterday was my last day as a CSR. And flight return was the last flight back onshore on my very last day. If you have added me in your facebook, you can see the pictures. I've decided to keep this blog picture free. Until I get bored of words. LOL.
It was quite an emotional departure, luckily a friend who is also a rigger who works for me talked to me until my chopper arrives and I unconsiously managed to hide my tears. I looked around at the area and I know it won't be the last time I will be there. But the next time when I do go offshore again, it won't be the same. Actually I am sad that I had to leave my guys. These guys I work with or work for me are really great men. They made me feel at home and their progress with work is relentless. I will miss Aiedee, Lagan, Khiddir, Himli and Clemond. These are the guys who I am close with. And off work they are my friends.
A few of them like Aiedee, Khiddir and Clemond will be my friends wherever they are. They don't just work for me or with me, but they are really good friends of mine.
So anyway, just an update about The Crush a.k.a "C". Since I asked myself when would I stop stuttering and being awkward when I face "C". I've decided to confront by giving "C" a call from offshore. And I told "C" everything. EVERYTHING. My feelings for "C" and all of that. And all I got were silence. I asked "C" whether "C" is angry or mad with my confession. "C" replied with a simple "Inda" ("Nope"). "C" just remain quiet and sounded a little awkward. After that phone call, I tried calling or messaging "C" to no avail. "C" is now ignoring me. I did ask "C" whether if my feelings is being reciprocated or not. Nothing.
So much for much for my big, big mouth. Now "C" is ignoring me. I am a ghost. But there is some relieve of some kind, I felt like a huge mountain have been lifted of my shoulder and now it's slowly turning into regret. Regret in this sense, is not regret that I have confessed my feelings to "C". But the regret is about now I've lost "C", because I think, and I presume "C" do not want to be friends or got to do anything with me anymore. I've lost "C". But I guess, not all is lost. Except for my pride and dignity. That has gone to the toilet.
So there you go... I'm still actually waiting for a miracle. Waiting for "C" to respond back. "C" promised to come back to me and give an answer. Perhaps "C" is thinking about what had I said. So I guess, I better hide myself for now. Feeling like wanting to be alone for a while. Until then, take good care of yourself and Ciao!
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